12:09 AM |
My house was renovated by a 6'7" man. I can't reach anything. I do have a little foldable stepladder that I have in my closet with my dresses. The only full length closet in my boudoir is literally 12 inches wide. I go with separates. I can get the ladder out and drag it around the house, but what's the point if you have a tall man around?
These are things I need to have reached:
My hats on the top shelf
Light fixtures that need to have the bugs cleaned out in them
The hanging baskets on the porch when I first put them up and when I forget to water them and they are almost beyond hope but then I soak them in a big tub of water overnight and they're pretty much okay until I'm too lazy to water them again
The copper gutter that's off it's clips because I ran a rental truck into it (hey, did you ever measure how high your gutters are off the driveway?)
The business records boxes on the top garage shelf that need to be shredded before more than two mice take up residence
Picture hooks- not putting in, but taking out- I can take the picture off, but you have to pull the nail up, not down to get the hanger off the wall
Anything to be hung up on the perfect Shaker pegs-- I can just yank jackets off, but I need to jump to put them back on, and half the time I either miss or they slide right off
The plants in the part of the truck bed closest to the cab
Those small appliances you have that you never (or almost never) use but you have to have anyway that are in the tippy top kitchen cabinets-- why the heavy ones always go up there, I'll never know, but I pack around them with miscellaneous Tupperware so that when you pull down the waffle maker, say, or the George Foreman grill, everything hits your head, but you burst out laughing because when you live by yourself, yelling Fuck, Shit, Fuckety Fuck just doesn't get any reaction
That's why my imaginary boyfriend is tall.
These are things I need to have reached:
My hats on the top shelf
Light fixtures that need to have the bugs cleaned out in them
The hanging baskets on the porch when I first put them up and when I forget to water them and they are almost beyond hope but then I soak them in a big tub of water overnight and they're pretty much okay until I'm too lazy to water them again
The copper gutter that's off it's clips because I ran a rental truck into it (hey, did you ever measure how high your gutters are off the driveway?)
The business records boxes on the top garage shelf that need to be shredded before more than two mice take up residence
Picture hooks- not putting in, but taking out- I can take the picture off, but you have to pull the nail up, not down to get the hanger off the wall
Anything to be hung up on the perfect Shaker pegs-- I can just yank jackets off, but I need to jump to put them back on, and half the time I either miss or they slide right off
The plants in the part of the truck bed closest to the cab
Those small appliances you have that you never (or almost never) use but you have to have anyway that are in the tippy top kitchen cabinets-- why the heavy ones always go up there, I'll never know, but I pack around them with miscellaneous Tupperware so that when you pull down the waffle maker, say, or the George Foreman grill, everything hits your head, but you burst out laughing because when you live by yourself, yelling Fuck, Shit, Fuckety Fuck just doesn't get any reaction
That's why my imaginary boyfriend is tall.