9:27 PM |
My last night on the road, I think. I'm 20 minutes north of the North Carolina border and I've slept about three minutes all night. But not for the obvious reason. There was noise all night. I take sleeping pills and it just didn't help. Turns out it wasn't the elevator or even the ice machine next door. It was the dozens of not so tiny feet running up and down the hall until at least 2:40 a.m. when I turned the clock face down. There is a basketball tournament this weekend, and this Holiday Inn Express is housing the players. Without adult supervision. In order to accommodate all the teams (I have no idea how many), they have assigned the kids rooms in all five of the hotels on this exit. The coaches and chaperones are equally randomly scattered. I wondered why I was able to get a room. I needed only one bed. They put four to a room. Thought I could make up the sleep by staying in bed until checkout time. The feet kept on going. Went down for Smart Coffee and told the girls in the elevator that they should be ashamed of themselves. Poured juice and noticed Saturday morning cartoons instead of CNN or the Weather Channel. Went to communal printer with intent of pulling a piece of paper to write complaint on. Top page:
This is Don. He is the one who guided me to Blue Mountain Coffee. I asked him if could buy him a cup. He was going to have a cup or a nap. He took the coffee. Regular coffee coffee. Don is from here, well not here but in this county. He was in the Army for two years and did hard stuff before becoming a signal man. He got out two months before the Iraq war started and was in Korea when 9/11 happened. Jobs are okay here, but mostly in restaurants. One of his roommates has a job at the restaurant that has no turnover. It is a really good job. Everybody wants it. Don works for an auto parts company named Fisher with a yellow and orange logo that he's sure I see everywhere. They have four big warehouses that deliver to 12 other warehouses. What makes Fisher best is all the small trucks. They deliver to garages all over the place. Little ones. He has errands to do.
Julie loves [insert pictures of flowers and stars here]
Scream!
[insert scribbles here]
Grabbed next piece of paper. Dear Coach, etc. etc. etc. sportsmanship etc. etc. etc. athletic performance etc. etc. etc. apology required. At that point I had not heard that there is no coach. There are no adults. There are only girls, girls, girls in various states of undress. Grab duffel bag and run.
As usual, Woody has not had his coffee and takes some time waking up. Two women appear rummaging though back minivan/suv/crossover/whatever decorated by the girls for "spirit" (in the rain, I might add) and decide that I need a jump. No ladies I do not need a jump. See if your lights go on. See, you need a jump. Wait, her lights are on. No shit Sherlock. Look, if you want to hook your 12-volt battery to my 6-volt one and spend the rest of the day pulling Woody to Pennsylvania, be my guest. Woody starts. I want to stick my tongue out.
As I mentioned, it is raining. I am not exactly sure where I am, but I have an idea of where I'm going. Home. I think, I think it is about 8 hours away. But who knows. I have come to expect the unexpected. Could end up at Farmer John's Chicken Farm. Drive. Drive. Drive. Get gas. Drive, Drive, Drive. See lots of signs for caverns: Luray, Mystery, "Mother Nature's Interior Decorator."Drive, Drive, Drive. See Smiley's BBQ. Ok, I'll give one more road BBQ a try. Smiley's is a very small truck stop with very large pumps. You can have Texas (tomato-based) or Carolina (vinegar-based) pulled pork sandwiches. I had Texas. It was ok. Threw out half. Exit was supposed to have a real coffee place. Did not. Drove, drove, drove. Saw sign for Purgatory Emporium on blue Attractions sign. Want to go, but on a mission to get home. Oh, two days ago I saw a bunch of exit signs to Bat Cave. Needed that at the time. Drove, drove, drove. See Starbucks logo on blue Food At Next Exit sign. Got off. Can't find Starbucks. Ask guy in next car at traffic light for directions. He said there are a bunch in town. Follow him. I do. Really cute town. I wish I knew what town that was. Gigantic watering can sculpture. I garden, a lot, so this was cool to me. On way out saw matching flower pot. Get to Blue Mountain Coffee. The coffee was good but the place a bit plain/empty.
This is Don. He is the one who guided me to Blue Mountain Coffee. I asked him if could buy him a cup. He was going to have a cup or a nap. He took the coffee. Regular coffee coffee. Don is from here, well not here but in this county. He was in the Army for two years and did hard stuff before becoming a signal man. He got out two months before the Iraq war started and was in Korea when 9/11 happened. Jobs are okay here, but mostly in restaurants. One of his roommates has a job at the restaurant that has no turnover. It is a really good job. Everybody wants it. Don works for an auto parts company named Fisher with a yellow and orange logo that he's sure I see everywhere. They have four big warehouses that deliver to 12 other warehouses. What makes Fisher best is all the small trucks. They deliver to garages all over the place. Little ones. He has errands to do.Drive, drive, drive. Stop for gas. Drive, drive, drive. Get Dunkin Munchkins. Drive, drive, well you get the idea. Drove a lot. Woody getting hot. This is the first time Woody has been hot. Stop at rest stop, open hood and let cool. Take go cup to bathroom to rinse. Been so long it's chunky. Look for paper towel to dry basin. Paperless. Scoop up crap in hand and shake it off into trash can. I don't know why people won't touch crap leftover in kitchen sink. You put it in your mouth so why wouldn't you pick it up? Woody is cool. I will not have overheating problems again. Driving on schedule to make it home by 7:30 (!!!). This trip has been almost perfect. Until the last 30 miles. I have driven this road about a billion times. I get lost. This is very difficult because it is absolutely straight for 40 miles. Somehow I got on the business route and couldn't get back on the regular one. Resorted to GPS, but only for awhile. Wants to take me home some screwy way. I have a difficult time with driving at night if there are opposing headlights too close or brights on or brights on from behind. I cannot begin to tell you how stressful this is for me. I am hoping, praying that these last couple of miles will be okay, that Woody won't do something wacky. Getting within range of ex-husband rescue. All ok. All ok. Across the road from my house. All okay!
I walked in, checked the mail and put Toddlers & Tiaras on. Picked up my needlepoint. Had five stinkbugs land in hair. Pick them out with toilet paper and flush. Watched America's Next Top Model (sort of because I sew so I can't see it anyhow). Ate Girl Scout cookies. In short, did everything I always do. I have gone 3200 miles, met hundreds of people, seen places I'd never even knew existed and absolutely nothing has changed. It is a time warp. I am very confused. And sad. Sorta. Put Lila Rae to bed.